When you do pushups, are you pushing yourself up or pushing the ground down?
If you’re a mere mortal not named Chuck Norris, you’re pushing yourself up – unless you’re a wimp who can’t do a pushup, in which case you’re face-planting into the ground.
Who is Chuck Norris?
If you don’t know who Chuck Norris is, I feel sad for you. It’s gonna hurt when he finds you. But just so you know who’s pummeling you when it happens, here’s some background about Chuck before the top 10 amazing Chuck Norris facts:
- Chuck first studied martial arts in the late 50s and early 60s in the Air Force
- From 1968, he held the middleweight Karate championship for six consecutive years before retiring a champion
- Norris trained A-list actors like Steve McQueen
- He played Bruce Lee’s villain in The Way of the Dragon. Norris asked Lee if he wanted to challenge the champion. Lee replied “No, I want to kill him.” (this quote is not satire)
- Later, scientists termed this match “the big bang.”
- He starred in many action films and the TV show Walker, Texas Ranger.
- We know the show was fiction because there were other rangers on it. If the Texas Rangers ever hired Norris, they wouldn’t need anyone else.
- Chuck Norris has become the subject of internet memes describing his extraordinary abilities. Are the memes fact or fiction? You decide…
Top 10 Unbelievable Chuck Norris Facts (or Memes?)
Number 10!
Death had a near-Chuck-Norris experience once.
Number 9!
Chuck Norris worked as a lumberjack in a forest named Sahara.
Number 8!
Chuck Norris can start a fire by rubbing two ice cubes together.
Number 7!
Chuck Norris can shoot down enemy planes by pointing at them and saying “Bang!”
Number 6!
Sharks have a Chuck Norris week.
Number 5!
The dinosaurs looked at Chuck Norris the wrong way once.
Number 4!
Chuck Norris and Superman got into a fight. The loser had to wear their underwear on the outside of their pants.
Number 3!
Chuck once cut a knife with melted butter.
Number 2!
The Statue of Liberty is actually alive. She’s been frozen in place since Chuck Norris told her “Don’t move.”
Drumroll… Number 1!
Chuck was hiking barefoot through the desert one day (poor cactii) when he got bitten by a huge diamondback rattler. After five excruciating days, the snake died.
I’m Finally Done with Chuck Norris
To be honest, I’m sick of these lame Chuck Norris jokes. If Chuck Norris was so good, he would come here right now and smash my face into my keyboaasbaianabakNaksosmamaksls
One response to “How to Push the Ground Down”
Dan, these are great. Thanks for providing some smiles for me today. I especially like Number 6! Sharks have a Chuck Norris week. Keep up the great work.